Both friends began to laugh and smiled at each other.
"Geez! You really think so DuL?"
"Indubitably! You definitely are amongst those who are close to Allah." Abdul said with a smile.
Jason gave a wide smile. "ARE YOU YANKING MY CHAINS?"
Abdul chortled. "No man I..."
Jason's phone began to ring. Christy's picture popped up on the screen. It only rang once and he picked up.
Jason held his hand up to Abdul as a gesture for him to hold that thought.
"Wassup boo?" Jason answered.
"Jason, where are you? Is Abdul with you?" Christy said.
"Who's asking?" Said Jason.
"His wife!" Shay's voice came on the other line. It was a three way call.
Jason quickly tucked the phone between his legs and mouthed the words "S-H-A-Y" in a inaudible tone to Abdul.
A single gleam of sweat trickled down the forehead of Abdul. He hesitantly gestured for Jason to hand him the phone. Jason removed the phone from between his legs and gave it to Abdul with a frightened look on his face.
"He-hey boo. I forgot to call the phone company and pay my phone bill."
"Where are you?"
"At home. With Jason."
"Jason? You find time for Jason but not your wife!" Shay said.
"It's not like that boo." Abdul said.
"Whatever. When can you come see me?" Shay asked.
"Unfortunately I will not be able to come see you today, for I have to go to the Masjid shortly after Asr."
At first Shay didn't know what Abdul was talking about. Then she thought for a minute and remembered what 'Asr' was. The late afternoon prayer.
"You go there everyday!" She exclaimed.
"Yes, this is true. I have to perform a lot of Istighfar."
"What is that?" Shay asked.
"I have to ask forgiveness from my Lord Allah Azzawajal The Most Merciful. Because my sins are like a mountain hovering above my head, and I fear that it will tumble down on me and crush me to death." Abdul bellowed out.
"Whatever. Come afterwards." Shay said.
Abdul began to think for a while. A stammer started to erupt in the back of his throat.
"Uhh... Umm... I'm so-sorry."
"What?" Shay asked in exasperation.
"The Prophet Muhammad Peace Be Upon Him gave clear instructions to go immediately straight to sleep after Isha has been offered." Abdul said.
"Are you freaking serious?" Shay asked.
"Yes. This was mentioned in a very sound hadeeth with a long chain of narrators."
"ABDUL!" Christy's voice came on the line.
"You gotta make time for your wife. I understand that Religion is very important to you but at the end of the day you chose to marry her. Isn't it also part of Religion to handle your responsibilities as a husband!" Christy said.
There was a long pause. "Nam nam. Yes yes. Everything that you are saying is true." Said Abdul.
"The Prophet Muhammad Peace Be Upon Him was the best to his wives was he not?" Christy asked.
"Nam." Abdul said in a low tone of voice.
"You wish to follow his example. Do you not?"
"Yes, yes! I absolutely do. For he is the best of the creation and the closest to Ar Rahman!"
"Okay then. Handle your responsibilities as a husband." Said Christy. She then hung up the bro phone. Abdul was left on the line with his wife.
"Abdul..." Shay said.
"I will be arriving at your abode shortly after Maghrib."
"In the evening?" Asked Shay.
"Yes." Replied Abdul.
"Okay..." Shay said with a smile.
"What do you want me to do now?" Shay asked.
"Wait for your man. I told you."
"Okay. I will wait for you." Shay said while biting her nail.
"What do you want me to do now?" Shay asked.
"Tell me that you love me and kiss me through the phone, then hang up. Your presence disgusts me." Abdul said.
Shay gave a light snicker. "I love you daddy." She said and blew him a kiss then hung up.
Abdul stood there and stared at the screen of his phone for a long second.
"Everything cool DuL?" Jason's voice came and snapped Abdul from the trance he was in.
"Yes. But I was wrong." Said Abdul.
"About what DuL?" Asked Jason.
"We did not mention cheese pizza at all. The reference made was spinach and Oreos pizza. You are not amongst those who are close to Ar Rahman. Your soul is destined to be in the hellfire for all eternity."